Friday, October 20, 2006

That elusive thing we call....

Love.

The double-edged sword. It is what makes monsters and angels alike. It is what turns into obsession. It is what hardens your heart.

It can be one-sided. It can be reciprocrated. It can tip the weighing scales. It can be sweet.

Recently, a friend got lost in love. She got lost so bad, she lost herself, her bearings, and...yesterday, TN and I were afraid she may lose her life as well. Looking at her, it pains me as a friend, as a fellow flesh and blood, and as someone who has been through it. I'm sad to say that nothing we did helped much. It was just as I see dozens of helpless old folks on the roads, homeless, I will give money to some, but I can't give money to all.

I can't advise on how I pulled through in the past. I might have lost a big part of my memory in doing so. But I can be very certain that if you have the courage to continue on, you will pull through. Don't give up on yourself, but don't sink any deeper either.

Love. It's a whirlpool.

Tuesday, October 17, 2006

BKK escapade

It has been 4 exhaustive days of walking and shopping in BKK. We lived 3 days of local life, 1 day of tourist life, and took plenty of pictures.

BKK is a diner's and shopper's haven. There's a huge variety of cheap food (palatable most of the time) & clothings (excluding the high-brow brands), economical clubbing & dining, dirt-cheap massage (according to Zee massage queen, Kimono) and low skytrain/taxi fare. We did not plan a detailed itinery ahead of time, but once we were there, we went by gut feel and things fell into place.

Thai girls in BKK are simply beautiful. Walk several steps and you can see a Maggie Q, walk a street and you will find more than one Sarah Shahi. Ok, I'm exaggerating here. But seriously, you can find more pretty and happy people in BKK than you can in the streets of HK, Taiwan, and Sg. Their service is good, their voices ring in your ears, and they are soothing to the eyes.

I was so mesmerised, I thought it would be nice to inject some of the Thai girls genes into our local scene :D (other than the time the gay boy stripped in front of me while I was browsing at Siam Sq :-s).

Alas, good things hardly do turn out perfect. I developed some kinda mild rash on the second day (not sure if it was due to the drinking water, bathing water, massage oil, or simply just the air). Kimono teased that I will never be able to bring back the Thai girls genes.

With that kinda allergy, I will most likely scratch myself to death before I can stay long enough to bring them back :(

Wednesday, October 11, 2006

Halt the love

Sl threw me some random (but noteworthy) questions a while ago:

Q: How do you know you have stopped loving someone?
A: The onset - You will not want to be engaged in any form of physical intimacy with the other party. No touching, no kissing, uh-uh. The aftermath - You will forget her last name, her birthday, her telephone number (I'm serious!).

Q: How fast can I stop loving someone?
A: It depends. If the other party has caused so much grief in you - so much so that you are utterly disappointed, the love can almost immediately stop. In contrast; if you were the one to let her down, cause her pain, break her heart...the love will take almost a lifetime to stop (exclude flings here please).

NB: Replace "her" with "him" if it's a guy :p

Tuesday, October 10, 2006

FAQ on being a pirate

In response to the queries I get from alerting my friends on the clamp down on piracy (ref: 7 houses raided and PCs/laptops confiscated for investigation) in today's ST, I have come up with some FAQ:

Q: I have been an avid fan of MP3/movies downloading sites. What should I do now??
A: Stop all downloading immediately. Delete the files from your PC. (This is only to hide any form of prima facie evidence, and works only when you have not been apprehended)

Q: How do they know which sites I have been going to?
A: Your ISP can track the sites you visit, and tie it back to your IP. They just need to pass it to the police now.

Q: How can they differentiate between the files I have ripped and those I have downloaded?
A: It's not that difficult, plus there are plenty of forensics tools which can do the job.

Q: The police is at my doorstep, do I start mass deletion?
A: No, it's too late. Forensics will reveal all and make you look like a boy caught with his hands in his pants.

Q: I surely must not be convicted, what can I do now?
A: Er...unless you have extra cash for PCs and a super strong magnetic field hidden somewhere like the villians in DC comics, you should stop all downloading.

Hope it helps ;)

Sunday, October 08, 2006

Waiting

As I wait to be "transited" to Mars, I got busy on a few things. I study for my exam, I consult and I made friends in Jupiter.

Basically, I'm having a better time than when I first touched down. Sometimes, I get a nagging feeling that my loved ones are kinda disappointed that I'm going over to Mars. I guess if you look at it from the moola p.o.v, it would really be that case.

On the other hand, Mars is the forefront of my career, giving me a chance to really pursue in my league. It will not be a lesser deal than Jupiter *for now*, since they topped and matched my status for at least a year. It is also definitely better than on Earth.

I have heard of people migrating from Jupiter to Mars as well, and I think they are the ones who believed in expeditions. Just as I had told one of my friends in Jupiter, it's either now or never. He understood, and he wished me luck. It was very sweet of him to say that, since I was supposed to take over his "Satellite Duty", giving him a chance to get out of Jupiter as well. My boss even offered referrals to Venus if I were to get lost or bored in Mars. I felt a double dosage of candy there.

There has been people whom I barely knew, coming up to me to ask why I was migrating. One of the computer support guys even called up my boss to ask. The guys joked about him "caring too much" and about us a bit. I did not mind that - in fact, they just made me feel more at home.

Of course, if I were to stay, there will definitely be bad days. The captains of the ships can't agree with each other, the crew has no direction, and the Mothership's GPS is basically outdated and resistant to upgrades. It will be a tough fight for me.

I try hard not to associate myself with a deserter - after all, I'm leaving to pursue my dreams in THE Mars. Some guys reminded me that I was hand-picked by the Mothership. Other guys have definitely made it easier for me by not harping on it, even though my boss has hinted time and again that he needs me.

In short, even though I'm barely 2 months in Jupiter, I have grown to like the place a bit. So my answer to my boss was, if you want me to stay in Jupiter, it would not have been a problem...the difference is...I have a CHOICE now.

And I chose the lesser evil of the two.

Saturday, September 30, 2006

Reality

I watched Lost and Delirious while taking a break. I did not finish it.

Before I watched the movie, I read reviews about it. How morbid, how extreme, how real. I think I know the ending more or less even if I didn't have the spoiler. I didn't have to watch further to be reminded of what a long and winding road it had been, and will be. It's a reality check.

By stereotyping, you would be able to find many Pauline-Tori relationships end up the same way. The more versatile girl will usually move on almost heartlessly with great success, while the less adaptable girl will drown in despair - literally. I do not need to be reminded of how hard I fought to be what I am today. Or of how much I had to forget in order to remember myself for tomorrow.

I want to be remembered for all the good things that have happened. I want to be remembered as the one who has made a difference. I want to be remembered as the one who proved things worked. I want to be remembered as the one who could not crumble - even though it was so hard "without you".

Maybe it's silly of me to smile like a child and relish Disney endings when I watch movies. Esp. more so when I watch movies like Saving Face and Imagine Me & U. It's not because I'm naive enough to pursue mindlessly at fairy tale endings in this ever-changing world.

Rather, it's because I know that Happy-ever-afters do exist. It's just a matter of where, when, and who.

Tuesday, September 26, 2006

You...and me

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=auK1JXyqgiA&mode=related&search=

Wednesday, September 20, 2006

xx.xx days into Jupiter

*Crackles*

Houston, this is Explorer, we have a problem. The soil here is dry and dull in color. The intriguing clouds observed from Earth have turned out to be a huge dust storm which destroyed part of the shuttle. The air has specs of dirt and breathing hurts my throat. I contracted a virus on the third day of my landing, and was shuttle-bound for 4 days. The food and water I brought will not be able to last through my expedition.

Please send backups to pilot me to Mars asap. Over.

Tuesday, September 12, 2006

Mismatched

I came out of one pothole to land myself into another.

I believe this is part of Your blueprint for me. Please then, hear me true this time round.

Sunday, September 10, 2006

On the day that I was born

It's MY day of the year again :D

Actually, there's nothing much to be really excited about, since I have already passed the quarter-of-century mark. But...what I'm excited about is what I have and is around me.

I have my parents, Kimono, a career and a few friends who care (Garfield surprised me!). My greatest gift of course, is having most of my Christmas wishes come true ;) My littleness is truly Your (my loved ones) greatness.

Although I got a fantastic gift from Kimono this year, her presence itself is already a GREAT gift :P

I thank God for all I have now.

Monday, August 14, 2006

Rapture

There has been an increase in the number of New York Times bestsellers of late on the Rapture. "Is it really going to happen?" "What will happen to those left behind?" Even the churches are vehemently preaching about (against or for) the End.

What really, is the Rapture all about?

There are 3 schools of thought - the pre-tribulation, mid-tribulation and post-tribulation. I don't think I should bore anyone with the nitty gritty details with the latter two, since they are not my take. Let's just hear more about the pre-tribulation then.

We are currently living at end of the Church age, where the political and climatic situations on earth are starting to turn erratic. Basically, everyone is shouting "PEACE!" but no one paying heed. Israelites will continue to cause damage to the Palestinians as long as Allah is God to them. Truly, the issue was never about THE land. It has always been about THE God.

Following tightly behind the Church age is the Age of Lawlessness. The Rapture is wedged right in between the 2.

No words can describe the horror and wickedness Humankind will be subjected to during the Age of Lawlessness. For 7 years, God will mask His eyes and allow the Beast to do whatever he wants to us.

The aim and purpose of the Rapture is thus to bring the dead and living in Christ up to Heaven in a twinkle of a moment, to escape the vicious and vile Age that is to follow immediately.

To many scientists, this phenomenon will be THE Bermuda Triangle effect played big, possibly a result of the clashes of the comets causing a Black Hole. They will theorise, postulate and even prove the origins of the Rapture.

To the left behind Chistians, they can only steel themselves for the vile Age to come.

My after taste? Whatever may come, it's definitely not a bed of roses. I can only wish that it will not come during my lifetime.

Tuesday, August 08, 2006

Saying Goodbye

It's never easy saying goodbye.

I have difficulties deciding who to hang up first after talking to Kimono. I will see my good friends to the bus stops and say "See you again" instead of "Goodbye!". I will wish my Mum "Goodnight" instead of saying "Goodbye" when I'm overseas.

As of yesterday, I will be leaving my current designation. I'm elated to have been given a great opportunity to make a diagonal move up. But I'm still at a lost when it comes to saying Goodbye. To compound matters, my immediate superior is leaving as well. I'm really happy for her; since she has found something she really likes - just as I have.

The stress level went up a notch when my Big Boss is caught at a really bad time - her V* team is left with one man - who well, is not very technically competent at this point in time. This resulted in me having to meet Big Boss's Big Boss and Big Boss's Big Boss's Big Boss. It's really tough repeating the same things over and again to different people.

Some things are better left unsaid.

As Kimono has always put it, I'm a politically correct person at work. Somehow, I still get the feeling that both my immediate superior and myself are being "squeezed dry" till our very last day of notice.

I knew it would not be easy the first day I took on this designation. But I never expected that leaving it would have created a HooHa. Maybe it's just a bad time for everyone in the organisation, other than my immediate superior and myself :D

-It's not the "Afterlife" that they are worried about, it's the people they leave behind that they worry about-

Thursday, August 03, 2006

The Keeper of promises

Dear Keeper of promises,

Thank You for Your unfailing love. I know I have not been Your best child. I know I have been lazy. And I know You have always been forgiving.

Thank You for answering all my last minute knocks on Your door. Thank You for Your guiding hand. You are my best Father. I wish I could be more - both to You, and Dad.

Your unfilial child

Imperfect

I haven't been the best :(|) of late.I guess it's due to a cocktail of skepticism, paranoia, uncertainty and frustration. Sometimes, I really think it's not worth all my effort, time and youth. I hope this won't be the beginning to an end.

It's been hard on Kimono :( Thank you for never giving up on me, for believing in me and always dispensing sound advice. I resolve to be a better :(|) to you. :-*

Friday, July 21, 2006

The Honour in wanting to give up

I think anyone would call me insane if I were to tell them there's honour in wanting to give up.

But think of this: If we never did achieve in the first place, what's there to give up? If we had nothing to lose, why are we afraid of losing? I bet LKY wanted to give up the very moment M'sia told us to pull out. I bet Issac Newton wanted to give up when he couldn't figure out the Centripetal forces.

There's nothing to be ashamed of when you want to give up. The trick lies in how much more do you lose when you give up? So lock yourself in and steer away from what tempts. You won't know what you will lose if you don't perserve.

Thursday, July 06, 2006

City of Reflection

After 4 days of leg-breaking shopping and eating, I'm finally home. I had to take a day off to recuperate from my aching limbs >:)

By and large, HK is a cosmopolitan city. The uncanny likeness to our Garden City stops not just at the fact that it too is a fashion hub cum shopping paradise. It too, was a British colony. It too has a large number of high rise buildings. It too, is infested with a large number of spitting Chinese nationals and hand-holding Indians. It too, has pushy crowds and crying babies in the MTR during the peak hours.

The mix of old and new architecture in the city is a sight that will not be missed. Just as often as you see full-panel-reflective-window sky scrapers; you will encounter many low rise run-down buildings which makes you wonder who and what resides beneath the grim and slum.

Mainstream shopping is divided into two. One, the HK and international brands. Two, the local designer brands. One is concentrated in large air-conditioned shopping malls, while Two is found strewn amongst tucked-away corners and themed shopping streets.

Shopping for One during the Sale period is pleasurable, coz the discount you get at the stores are generally better than those back home. Also, HK fashion is one season ahead of us ;) Shopping for Two is not fantastic; since the local designers lack the Japanese's creativity and the Taiwanese's innovation. What you can find there, you can easily find a cut-and-paste across the Causeway.

Meanwhile, the Sun was really harsh. Kimono got sun burnt and I almost suffered a stroke on our way back from Ocean Park. To think we were not even near the beach. Haha..

At the start of the trip, Kimono and I went with 1 luggage. At the end of the trip, we came back with 2 luggages; weighing 17kg and 10kg respectively ;p The perks of shopping in HK during Summer are the great bargains and appropriate season wear. However, while you are busy checking out that great skirt, remember the sunblock...for you never know when the Sun will sneak up on you to give a nasty burn :p

Monday, June 12, 2006

Short getaway!

Ah boy is going to HK! This time round it's pretty impromptu...so....dun expect that it will be as fruitful as Taipei.

Oh well, but who noes ;)

Wednesday, June 07, 2006

Mapcap Rush

It's that time of the year again...the Great Singapore Sale.

Everywhere you go, you see a big Red Sign slapped right in the middle of even the most glamorous display window. There are human throngs at every corner you turn. And it's also the time when your pockets get humongous holes in them.

Recently crowned the "Shopaholic" by Blossom, I feel somewhat inadequate...or rather mis-crowned. For out of the so many great bargains, I did not grab any earth-shattering deals. Let's take a look at some of my purchases:

1) Black elfy shoes from HP (20%)
2) Kimono's birth year retro T-shirt from Guess (70%)
3) Weirdo printed shirt from Guess (70%)
4) Levi's 519 (30%)
5) Pants from Isetan (Plain vanilla since it's new stock)
6) Weirdo embroidered shirt from Fox (15%, and to think I rejected the offer on 1-for-1 coz I didn't feel like another 1!)
7) Berms from Taka (50%)
8) Prey from Borders (50%)
9) Classic T from Timberland (50%)
10) Deuter Rider (30%)

Coming up....more from HK...

So as you can see...I'm not very much of a bargain hunter :D Looks like I should give up my crown to another reigning Shopaholic.

On a sidenote...Kimono has found a new job!!!! I'm so happy that she's finally getting outta that shithole co. Good riddance to bad rubbish! Oh, and I hope oinky's new home will have better air :D

Thursday, May 18, 2006

Twilight

It has been a real stressful period for me. This is the FIRST time I feel stress since I have started on this job. With one presentation over just today, I have two more to conduct within this month.

While chatting with a friend yesterday, we concluded that we were pretty much unappreciated in our area of work. Well, maybe his more than mine (since he was real bent on migrating asap to greener pastures). Most of the time though, I'm too overworked to allow the injustice to set in. By the time I feel it, my body would have given in to fatigue and I have fallen asleep.

At times when I'm taking a breather (such as now), I will experience a strong urge to start flipping the cobwebbed copy of Executive Appointments. That being said, the strong urge will subsequently fade into a nagging voice as I treasure my free time too much to start seaching for another beginning to an end :p

Ok, I know I know. These are just well made up excuses for a bummer procrastinator like me. I should just get my arse off the chair to flip that copy of Executive Appointments 8-|

Monday, April 24, 2006

Split second

I'm clearing leave these days. Not to go on holidays, but to join in the buzz with Kimono and Blossom in house moving. Packing, tearing down, washing, putting up, packing. Boy, am I tired. But this tiredness sure beats the mental drain at work. My optician just informed me that I'm suffering from a syndrome known as "Computer Illusion". I'm really beginning to question if the effort I put in at work is really worth it.

Shortly after the move, the gers will depart for a pretty island amongst the Philipines. While I, will be slogging away at a migration at work over the long weekend. :(( Sigh...I really need a break.