it's ren ri today, and time for family time.
in past years, by ren yi, i would have tossed the chinese salad upteempth times. this year, i think the count stands at a low 3.
On this day, our birthday, Empress Dowager's mental power appears to be slipping. When I came out of the bedroom, she remarked: "I haven't seen this pair of berms before, is it new?" (It's not)
When women in my life start asking questions of this nature, it's either their attention span is sliding...or I really have a lot of berms (I don't).
Her next remark was even more baffling...directed at the taiwanese serial she was watching, she said: "不要人家就算了吧, 为什么还要欺负人?" -_-"
Walking past with an unstable gait, my Dad shook his head and smiled.
- To a certain degree, this is the general theme that H is increasingly alluding to: this is part and parcel of life. -
In the good old days, where cookies were crunchy sweet baked dough we could chew on, I would not have to battle mysterious cookies on my lappie.
Can I throw a few rock-hard cookies at my lappie?!?
Sunday, January 29, 2012
kindness in adversity
"Goodbye Elizabeth. Goodbye my love, goodbye my friend. My pain. My joy. Goodbye.”
— Matt King
An imperfectly perfect example of what love encompasses... :) Matt inspiringly muddles through the thick of things, but mostly with touching compassion as he is being thrown life's curveballs all at the same time. You'll be surprised what you are capable of forgiving only when you are thrown into the situation.
Shailene Woodley rocks! This new girl on the block is not just a pretty face - diagnosed with scoliosis at the age of 15, she's come a long way :p
— Matt King
An imperfectly perfect example of what love encompasses... :) Matt inspiringly muddles through the thick of things, but mostly with touching compassion as he is being thrown life's curveballs all at the same time. You'll be surprised what you are capable of forgiving only when you are thrown into the situation.
Shailene Woodley rocks! This new girl on the block is not just a pretty face - diagnosed with scoliosis at the age of 15, she's come a long way :p
Thursday, January 26, 2012
gracias a Dios
dear Father, thank You.
Although I know what I'm told may not be the truth (given Batman's penchant for flowery words - ref: previous entry on flowery words dispensed), there should be a certain truth to it.
I know from examples of Fatboy and Ah Beng that where You allow flowery half-truths, you would have ascertained that they serve to enable and not disable me.
I will grit my teeth and walk my blueprint and learn to live and let live.
Although I know what I'm told may not be the truth (given Batman's penchant for flowery words - ref: previous entry on flowery words dispensed), there should be a certain truth to it.
I know from examples of Fatboy and Ah Beng that where You allow flowery half-truths, you would have ascertained that they serve to enable and not disable me.
I will grit my teeth and walk my blueprint and learn to live and let live.
Sunday, January 22, 2012
drew and chances
-don't write me off (revised)-
It's never been easy for me
To find words to go along with a melody
But this time there's actually something, on my mind
So please forgive these few brief awkward lines
Since I met you, my whole life has changed
It's not just my office hours you've rearranged
I was living in my world, but somehow you've brought me back
And I haven't felt like this since Frankie sang "relax"
And while I know, based on my track record,
I might not seem like the safest bet
All I'm asking you is don't write me off, just yet
For years I've been telling myself the same old story
That I'm happy to live off my so-called former memories
But you've given me a reason to take another chance
Now I need you, despite the fact that you've killed all my pride
And though I know, I've already blown more chances
Than anyone should ever get
All I'm asking you is don't write me off, just yet
Don't write me off just yet...
It's never been easy for me
To find words to go along with a melody
But this time there's actually something, on my mind
So please forgive these few brief awkward lines
Since I met you, my whole life has changed
It's not just my office hours you've rearranged
I was living in my world, but somehow you've brought me back
And I haven't felt like this since Frankie sang "relax"
And while I know, based on my track record,
I might not seem like the safest bet
All I'm asking you is don't write me off, just yet
For years I've been telling myself the same old story
That I'm happy to live off my so-called former memories
But you've given me a reason to take another chance
Now I need you, despite the fact that you've killed all my pride
And though I know, I've already blown more chances
Than anyone should ever get
All I'm asking you is don't write me off, just yet
Don't write me off just yet...
drive home
Drive home tuned into 95 one day...
I'd rather have bad times with you, than good times with someone else
I'd rather be beside you in a storm, than safe and warm by myself
I'd rather have hard times together, than to have it easy apart
I'd rather have the one who holds my heart
I'd rather have bad times with you, than good times with someone else
I'd rather be beside you in a storm, than safe and warm by myself
I'd rather have hard times together, than to have it easy apart
I'd rather have the one who holds my heart
Wednesday, January 18, 2012
great lengths to ask for directions
I was walking through the link way just the other day...and texting on my phone, when I heard a loud "Excuse me!". I continued on...since there was no one in my way or me in anyone's way. Almost immediately, an angmoh lady appeared in my path shouting: "Excuse me!!!".
So I looked at her squarely and went: "Yes????"
She asked: "Do you know which way it is to S*? Should I be taking the train or?"
WTF?? It was the peak hour and I'm not the only person walking through the link way. Besides, I appeared and really was occupied!!!
I should be crowned this century's most-approached person for directions.
The irony of it all??? I'm a walking directionless idiot. :p
So I looked at her squarely and went: "Yes????"
She asked: "Do you know which way it is to S*? Should I be taking the train or?"
WTF?? It was the peak hour and I'm not the only person walking through the link way. Besides, I appeared and really was occupied!!!
I should be crowned this century's most-approached person for directions.
The irony of it all??? I'm a walking directionless idiot. :p
the real mccoy
"It's easy to love the idea of u, but to love the real deal. ..lock, stock and barrel. .."
Loving a person for who he / she really is.
-Seen and overheard-
Loving a person for who he / she really is.
-Seen and overheard-
Monday, January 16, 2012
it's not all fluff ya know?
N said something that made me do a double-take.
"In good times, it's easy to connect. In bad times (when one or both parties are hurt and confused) that's the crucial time to connect. The truths we tell ourselves sometimes..about "treasures" we find need to be re-examined. Don't sell our souls to the devil in exchange for a "treasure". It's easy to be taken for granted in this world, sometimes you think it doesn't matter but..."
But it does.
In short, it's a version of Fishie's "It takes a lot to fall for someone. But it takes more for the same someone to stay by your side when you eventually fall" :-O
I must have been named jerk, rubbish and arsehole (still called that by pb!) countless times in the past. Haha. ..and if I didn't know better...I would say N said it in 20-20 hindsight with a tinge of cynism. It's hindsight for sure, but...I guess not 20-20...esp. since she has been through the path of hurt and deceit yet continued on. Haha...
"In good times, it's easy to connect. In bad times (when one or both parties are hurt and confused) that's the crucial time to connect. The truths we tell ourselves sometimes..about "treasures" we find need to be re-examined. Don't sell our souls to the devil in exchange for a "treasure". It's easy to be taken for granted in this world, sometimes you think it doesn't matter but..."
But it does.
In short, it's a version of Fishie's "It takes a lot to fall for someone. But it takes more for the same someone to stay by your side when you eventually fall" :-O
I must have been named jerk, rubbish and arsehole (still called that by pb!) countless times in the past. Haha. ..and if I didn't know better...I would say N said it in 20-20 hindsight with a tinge of cynism. It's hindsight for sure, but...I guess not 20-20...esp. since she has been through the path of hurt and deceit yet continued on. Haha...
Friday, January 13, 2012
human compassion in a zoo
"What I’ve figured out is, when you love somebody that much, that hard... You can never get away from them no matter where you go. And that only comes… once in a life time. Just can’t get a handle on it. I cannot let go."
“You know, sometimes all you need is twenty seconds of insane courage. Just literally twenty seconds of just embarrassing bravery. And I promise you, something great will come of it.”
20 seconds to tell her you love her.
20 seconds to tell him you care.
20 seconds to change.
20 seconds to be bigger.
“You know, sometimes all you need is twenty seconds of insane courage. Just literally twenty seconds of just embarrassing bravery. And I promise you, something great will come of it.”
20 seconds to tell her you love her.
20 seconds to tell him you care.
20 seconds to change.
20 seconds to be bigger.
:D
I keep hearing this song on the radio waves on my drive home. It reminds me of how over the years, various folks have told me that I connect easily with them. However, it's rare that one of those could connect back up with me.
Although I've found my rainbow connection...maintanence is never a walk in the park.
How many of you know this song was first sung by Kermit?? :p h seems to think that it's not a contrived effort at all!
_____________________________________________
Why are there so many songs about rainbows
And what's on the other side?
Rainbows are visions, but only illusions,
And rainbows have nothing to hide.
So we've been told and some choose to believe it.
I know they're wrong, wait and see.
Someday we'll find it, the rainbow connection.
The lovers, the dreamers and me.
Who said that every wish would be heard
And answered when wished on the morning star?
Somebody thought of that and someone believed it.
Look what it's done so far.
What's so amazing that keeps us star gazing
And what do we think we might see?
Someday we'll find it, the rainbow connection.
The lovers, the dreamers and me.
All of us under its spell.
We know that it's probably magic.
Have you been half asleep and have you heard voices?
I've heard them calling my name.
Is this the sweet sound that called the young sailors.
The voice might be one and the same.
I've heard it too many times to ignore it.
It's something that I'm supposed to be.
Someday we'll find it, the rainbow connection.
The lovers, the dreamers and me.
Although I've found my rainbow connection...maintanence is never a walk in the park.
How many of you know this song was first sung by Kermit?? :p h seems to think that it's not a contrived effort at all!
_____________________________________________
Why are there so many songs about rainbows
And what's on the other side?
Rainbows are visions, but only illusions,
And rainbows have nothing to hide.
So we've been told and some choose to believe it.
I know they're wrong, wait and see.
Someday we'll find it, the rainbow connection.
The lovers, the dreamers and me.
Who said that every wish would be heard
And answered when wished on the morning star?
Somebody thought of that and someone believed it.
Look what it's done so far.
What's so amazing that keeps us star gazing
And what do we think we might see?
Someday we'll find it, the rainbow connection.
The lovers, the dreamers and me.
All of us under its spell.
We know that it's probably magic.
Have you been half asleep and have you heard voices?
I've heard them calling my name.
Is this the sweet sound that called the young sailors.
The voice might be one and the same.
I've heard it too many times to ignore it.
It's something that I'm supposed to be.
Someday we'll find it, the rainbow connection.
The lovers, the dreamers and me.
Thursday, January 12, 2012
parental beckoning - story of 2 adults 4 kids
My assessment of my current parental abilities is: budding (still learning the ropes), nonchalant (during trying times, die!), doting (not very conducive I was told).
One of the first few names I wanted Q to call out was my name :D I kept urging, teaching, mouthing to (as though if it would help) her.
Eventually, when she called me (and not just once, numerous times and loudly at that!), I was surprised, and haha...a little un-prepared. When she couldn't stop calling me, I was kinda lost as to what she wanted (yikes).
Kids are a joyful bundle. The older generation tends to believe that kids harmonise and complete a family.
I know and I heard the expectations on me...from everyone near and dear...so! since the most important opinions conflict, I think the expectations have to be shelved. I respect love and my loved one and I hope I'm doing the right thing.
Empress Dowager has been ill...Hence! I don't think by fulfilling expectations on the same note would help anytime soon.
I did see the downside of having bawling kids surrounding you with no route for escape! fat-san covered his ears and popped panadol. I filtered them out. Perhaps here's where nonchalance comes in handy (*gulp* and here's where the 2 adults faint with exhaustion)
One of the first few names I wanted Q to call out was my name :D I kept urging, teaching, mouthing to (as though if it would help) her.
Eventually, when she called me (and not just once, numerous times and loudly at that!), I was surprised, and haha...a little un-prepared. When she couldn't stop calling me, I was kinda lost as to what she wanted (yikes).
Kids are a joyful bundle. The older generation tends to believe that kids harmonise and complete a family.
I know and I heard the expectations on me...from everyone near and dear...so! since the most important opinions conflict, I think the expectations have to be shelved. I respect love and my loved one and I hope I'm doing the right thing.
Empress Dowager has been ill...Hence! I don't think by fulfilling expectations on the same note would help anytime soon.
I did see the downside of having bawling kids surrounding you with no route for escape! fat-san covered his ears and popped panadol. I filtered them out. Perhaps here's where nonchalance comes in handy (*gulp* and here's where the 2 adults faint with exhaustion)
Thursday, January 05, 2012
national compromise
H asked me today...did you hear about the compromise? how did it happen?
Having only the description from her, I could only postulate.
1) An insider file containing the Mag S # and A # is leaked. Combined with a "skimmer" at the $ box stealing the secret.
2) $ box's expressway has an Alien residing on it. Alien reports back to Mothership, with Aliens changing $ information on the fly.
H thinks 2) is unlikely given her experience. So smart, I feel so proud of you! :D
let's see what the nation gives in response.
Having only the description from her, I could only postulate.
1) An insider file containing the Mag S # and A # is leaked. Combined with a "skimmer" at the $ box stealing the secret.
2) $ box's expressway has an Alien residing on it. Alien reports back to Mothership, with Aliens changing $ information on the fly.
H thinks 2) is unlikely given her experience. So smart, I feel so proud of you! :D
let's see what the nation gives in response.
total recall
Over nye, in a zest to cheer empress dowager up, we brought her to C for dim sum. It wasn't until 4 days later that she told me dining in that place reminds her of Aunt A. Of how Aunt A said she would continue to bring her there for food in future, of how Aunt A and her talked about the old celebrities. At that moment, empress dowager cried. I found a huge apple in my throat and salted h2o gathered in my eyes.
In relating and discussing this, we agreed never to bring empress dowager to C again.
In relation to Aunt A, I acknowledge that while yes, letting go of her death is the thing to do, however the cause remains much debated. I know that words preached with weight should have a certain responsibility pegged to them. Esp. when one is priority and his or her words seemed like promises or saving grace. One has to be cognisant of the impact.
I have a soft and weak heart. In the last few months, I realised my anchor pastor of 7yrs has become an extremist in his teachings. I could not bear to stay.
The place I started going to for a few months now maybe boring and conventional...however, the priest's teachings are simple and never convoluted.
Sometimes I wonder - in all the wonderous pull of charasmatic churches dispensing savoury teachings, has anyone stopped to ponder the flipside of the coin?
In relating and discussing this, we agreed never to bring empress dowager to C again.
In relation to Aunt A, I acknowledge that while yes, letting go of her death is the thing to do, however the cause remains much debated. I know that words preached with weight should have a certain responsibility pegged to them. Esp. when one is priority and his or her words seemed like promises or saving grace. One has to be cognisant of the impact.
I have a soft and weak heart. In the last few months, I realised my anchor pastor of 7yrs has become an extremist in his teachings. I could not bear to stay.
The place I started going to for a few months now maybe boring and conventional...however, the priest's teachings are simple and never convoluted.
Sometimes I wonder - in all the wonderous pull of charasmatic churches dispensing savoury teachings, has anyone stopped to ponder the flipside of the coin?
Monday, January 02, 2012
B-grade alien & sci-fi movies rock! (it's an acquired taste yea)
Memorable ones...
- E.T. (classic, need say more?)
- Back to the Future (nice car by my childhood standards! sequels are forgettable!)
- Stargate (hieroglyphics, science and love all interwoven into one)
- Independence Day (erm, my Dad's fav...haha)
- Bicentennial Man (my all-time fav love story, it resonates deep with the situation i'm in :|)
- Gattaca (where I draw my inspiration to grow taller)
- Fifth Element (erm...watch for chio bu)
- UltraViolet (erm...watch for chio bu)
- Species! (the sequel however erm...qualifies for soft porn :-s)
- Alien (fugly things fight well! sequels turn fuglier - literally)
- Artificial Intelligence (this is surprisingly touching...will invoke tears)
- Matrix (mid-air slow-mo kick made famous. by now you should know i'm not a fan of sequels...they are simply...DUH)
- I, Robot (explains why some people / robots do the things they do)
- The Day the Earth stood still (erm...very sacrificial)
- War of the Worlds AKA Tripod (haha...screaming girl or big ass? your choice)
- The Adjustment Bureau (this guy damn resolute in love)
- Resident Evil (exception to my sequels theory - i love all of them here!!! watch for chio bu...need say more? :p)
- Super8 (nostalgia...)
- Tron Legacy (erm...watch for chio bu 2)
- Priest (erm...watch for chio bu 3)
- In Time (teaches us to live every moment like your last...watch for chio bu 4 and 5)
- The Darkest Hour (very good camaraderie ;) trained engineers will know the way to stay alive 20min into the movie)
the downside is...I have watched more than 3x the number of DUH films to come up with this list!! :p
- E.T. (classic, need say more?)
- Back to the Future (nice car by my childhood standards! sequels are forgettable!)
- Stargate (hieroglyphics, science and love all interwoven into one)
- Independence Day (erm, my Dad's fav...haha)
- Bicentennial Man (my all-time fav love story, it resonates deep with the situation i'm in :|)
- Gattaca (where I draw my inspiration to grow taller)
- Fifth Element (erm...watch for chio bu)
- UltraViolet (erm...watch for chio bu)
- Species! (the sequel however erm...qualifies for soft porn :-s)
- Alien (fugly things fight well! sequels turn fuglier - literally)
- Artificial Intelligence (this is surprisingly touching...will invoke tears)
- Matrix (mid-air slow-mo kick made famous. by now you should know i'm not a fan of sequels...they are simply...DUH)
- I, Robot (explains why some people / robots do the things they do)
- The Day the Earth stood still (erm...very sacrificial)
- War of the Worlds AKA Tripod (haha...screaming girl or big ass? your choice)
- The Adjustment Bureau (this guy damn resolute in love)
- Resident Evil (exception to my sequels theory - i love all of them here!!! watch for chio bu...need say more? :p)
- Super8 (nostalgia...)
- Tron Legacy (erm...watch for chio bu 2)
- Priest (erm...watch for chio bu 3)
- In Time (teaches us to live every moment like your last...watch for chio bu 4 and 5)
- The Darkest Hour (very good camaraderie ;) trained engineers will know the way to stay alive 20min into the movie)
the downside is...I have watched more than 3x the number of DUH films to come up with this list!! :p
cleaning out!
the tail of 2011 has barely slid into hibernation and i was hurled into cleaning out to prepare for CNY.
To us Chinese, CNY is a huge affair (used to be more so when I was a kid) - Packing away old clothes for donation, clearing out clutter, storing away knick knacks we no longer need, and major dusting and cleaning.
I have been nagged and bugged at already :p - to trim my hair (I missed the golden window last week and now we need to book in a slot for this week); to buy new bright colored clothes (in my opinion, I shopped and bought so much these 2 weeks both in and out of SG but none of my purchases fulfilled the standard of "bright colored"); to buy new year goodies for parents.
To date, I've polished the mirrors, packed wardrobes, cleared out old clothes for donation, cleaned the dust off cabinets...
Next CNY, I will need helpers. And we'll have to make sure there's enough lead time to cater for "within-a-month" festivities like Christmas and CNY.
To us Chinese, CNY is a huge affair (used to be more so when I was a kid) - Packing away old clothes for donation, clearing out clutter, storing away knick knacks we no longer need, and major dusting and cleaning.
I have been nagged and bugged at already :p - to trim my hair (I missed the golden window last week and now we need to book in a slot for this week); to buy new bright colored clothes (in my opinion, I shopped and bought so much these 2 weeks both in and out of SG but none of my purchases fulfilled the standard of "bright colored"); to buy new year goodies for parents.
To date, I've polished the mirrors, packed wardrobes, cleared out old clothes for donation, cleaned the dust off cabinets...
Next CNY, I will need helpers. And we'll have to make sure there's enough lead time to cater for "within-a-month" festivities like Christmas and CNY.
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